RT-Fest 2011

Hopefully, this will answer any questions you may have about what's been going on as a result of this Twitter post.

As many of you know, I got married last Sunday (YAY!).

See? Wedding party. Yes, I wore a black dress.

As at least some of you know, my husband (the blonde guy next to me) is from Scotland.

As a few of you know, marrying someone who is not a US citizen when you are a US citizen is nothing whatever like it is in the movies. I won't go into it all here, but I encourage you to check out the K-1 (fiancé(e)) and K-3 (spouse) visa sections at VisaJourney.com. You'll see guides on how to fill out the numerous forms required, support groups for coping with the stress and forced time apart, advice from people who have done it before, and a place to vent when it all just gets to be too much. It is an extremely long and expensive process that can take months or years and thousands of dollars.

Remember in Cheers when Woody's girlfriend Kelly had that French friend, Henri, who wanted Kelly to marry him so he could stay in America? Well, if it had been real life and Kelly had gone through with it, she would have faced 5 years of jail and Henri could have been permanently deported. It's considered a very serious type of fraud and the government doesn't take it lightly.

A few people have asked me recently, "but you're married - how can there be any more obstacles and fees?" Good question. The answer: Okay, so, the government gives K-1 visa holders 90 days from the day they enter the country to marry their American fiancé(e) and file what is called an Adjustment of Status to the Department of Homeland Security. Even if you follow that link, I really don't expect you to read through all of the government jargon, so in short, that is what changes a K-1 visa holder into a person who is allowed to stay in the US indefinitely. I knew that we would have to file this form, but for some reason, I thought we were done with the fees, since there have been SO many and have added up to SO much money, and I really thought that that part was overwith.

I learned just the other day how wrong I was. It turns out that the fee, which must accompany the Adjustment of Status form, is $1070. To some people, that's not a lot of money. To us, it is a fortune, and we just didn't have it. Failing to file that form and pay that fee, however, would mean that Fraser's visa would expire and he would have to exit the country until we had re-filed and gone through a whole new process.

The thought of that happening was exhausting and scary, so I posted to Twitter that if enough people bought photos from our Etsy shop, that would help us raise the money we need to pay the fee. You know what I thought would happen after I posted that? I thought a handful of personal friends would buy something and say they hoped it would work out. When I saw people start to retweet my post, I was touched. When people kept retweeting it, I was overcome with thanks that for at least a few seconds, complete strangers as well as amazing friends cared. When I woke up the next morning to see that Neil Gaiman had retweeted it, I was truly gobsmacked. A few people have asked me how I "got him to do it," and the answer is that I didn't. He must follow someone who posted it and then felt compelled to share.

Whatever the reason, his heart or his shoes, that had a massive impact. About half of the sales we have made have been a result of Mr. Gaiman's retweet. As it stands now, we're more than halfway to our goal and our outlook is much sunnier.

Unfortunately, some of the people who have been kind enough to help out have taken some flack. I understand that there are people who (rightly) do not believe everything they read on the Internet and (also rightly) do not automatically assume that everyone is honest. The comments from those people, who simply want some indication that I'm a real person and this isn't all just some marketing ploy, I don't take personally. There have been a few, however, who seem to have come from generally unhappy and/or angry people, who have accused me of engaging in emotional blackmail to compel innocent people to buy something they neither need nor want. One even used the word "larceny" to describe what they saw as an elaborate scam.

To that, I can only say this: every purchase was made by an adult with free will. Also, I never asked anyone to retweet anything. As I said, I thought a few people I already know might help out by either buying something or telling that friend of theirs who just bought a house where they might get some art to hang on their new walls. That kind people chose to retweet and ask their friends and followers to help was an unexpected bonus and a real, tangible help. I hate that their good deeds have been punished by harsh words.